The Positive Side of Pain

Many of my younger friends describe their attraction to the “pain” of new “ink” being applied to their bodies.  They also describe the deep drive that takes them back time after time to the ink artist.  There must be something going on deep in the human soul that keeps driving these friends back to the “chair of pain”.  While my skin is virgin, and I have no direct experience of that kind of pain, all of us know very well that the human experience includes pain.  We have all hurt - this is something that we all have in common.  Pain is a part of the journey called life and is a place where we can stand in solidarity together regardless of age, gender, race, or whatever.  All God’s children have or will endure pain.

Is there a positive side to pain?  In my personal life, I can say that when l reflect back, the seasons of pain were the seasons where I learned and grew the most.  We have all heard it said, “no pain - no gain”.  The beauty and creativity of the tattoo artist cannot be revealed without pain.  The beauty and glory of your soul cannot be fully revealed without pain.  I personally believe that the Spirit that guides the soul will intuitively drive us into seasons of pain in order that we can be transformed.  Just maybe, this might be the same deep intuition that unconsciously drives my friends back to the chair of the artist.

I offer to you five positive benefits of pain for your reflection.

- Pain helps us understand other people who are in pain
I catch myself at times not trusting those who have yet to really suffer. There is no doubt in my mind that when we we suffer - it teaches us how to be compassionate to others who suffer.

- Pain helps us to better understand pleasure
By this I mean, what we view as pleasure is usually transformed by pain. Things that we once over looked are now so obviously beautiful.  Things that we took for granted are now blessings and gifts. Our priorities seem to shift when we suffer - the things that become the most important now are often the most simple and primary.

- Pain toughens us up
Modern culture has no doubt been a whiney and spoiled culture.  Pain toughens us up and forces us to grow up.  If we can get through one episode of pain - we can now trust the universe and ourselves to get through the next.  Pain moves us out of the baby stage and on toward maturity.

- Pain opens us up
The culture at times can be so haughty and rigid.  When you experience a person who has been through a lot of pain - you notice that the haughtiness and rigidity has been beat out of them.  They stand open and receptive.  Their soul has been dug out - they now possess greater capacity to live life more fully.

- All social justice movements are born out of pain.
When we reflect back on history we can see that the great prophets who have impacted the world found their voice in the midst of pain and struggle. Their voices were raised up from the ashes.  They struggled and suffered until one day they crossed the point of no return and said enough already. They got to the place where it would not matter to them if the call for freedom cost them their life - they were going to speak their truth.  Without pain, I am not sure any of us would find the place of true freedom.

In conclusion, let me encourage you to let your pain be pain.  It is never pleasant or fun to have to suffer.  The shallowness of the culture will often try to draw us out of our pain prematurely, The result of not letting our pain be pain is that we miss the transformative and creative essence of the dark seasons.  May we have the courage and strength to face our demons, the wilderness, and the dark night.  For it is there the soul is transformed.  For it is in dying that we learn to live.

The Soul's Scale

What I'm about to share is a simple concept.  Matter of fact, it is so simple that it will be very easy to just read right over and miss the revolutionary power of the statement to affect one's entire perception of reality.

"The soul is not in the body; the body is in the soul".

The majority of mystical systems and traditions have held up that the body is in the soul, not the other way around.  This distinction allowed for the scale of the soul to be greater maybe even infinite.  This understanding promoted the idea that we are enclosed by the soul.  This is in contrast to the reduced view and scale of the soul that has developed in Modern Western Culture.  The effects of the Industrial Revolution turned us into machines on an assembly line.  Combined with Newtonian Science that gave us a view of the universe that was not organic and living but dead and mechanistic.  Add to that, the views of René Descartes, the Father of Modern Western Philosophy, who held that if we have souls at all it is located and associated with the Pituitary Gland; which is about the size of a pea.  Modern Western Culture radically changed our perception of the soul's scale; possibly taking it away from us all together.  And without soul, we become machines going through the motions, punching time cards, cogs in the wheel, the living dead in a dead universe.

Miester Eckhart said, "go in, go into your soul, you will find it contains the whole universe".  Contrast Eckhart's scale of the soul compared to Descartes'; the whole universe compared to a pea.  Eckhart was not alone with his view. All the Medieval Christian Mystics held that the soul was infinite and that it enclosed the body; that all of life was enclosed, contained, and gently held by the soul.

Please, don't loose how revolutionary flipping this simple phrase can be.  Reclaim your infinite soul. Refuse to be a machine in a mechanistic universe.  Remove from your vocabulary the phrase "the soul is in the body".  Instead, proclaim boldly that, "the body is in the soul".  Live boldly with the idea that your soul is vast and expanse; that your soul gently holds all that you are and encloses you in and with infinite wisdom and love.

Technologies of the Soul

The spiritual life is a life lived in bliss, a life intoxicated by life itself, a life of savoring every ecstasy, a life filled with awe and wonder and joy.  It is a way of living where life is mystical and magical; a life filled with surprises and a life of radical amazement by even the simplest of things.

Unfortunately, life circumstances come to us in cold and harsh ways.  Being shamed as a child, being hurt by someone we loved, being betrayed by someone we trusted.  All of us know what it feels like to be disappointed, let down, and to live with the fact that things did not work out like we had hoped.  All of us have shared the experience of pain, of being wounded, and had to deal with loss. Sometimes our pain is self inflicted.  Other times we are victims of someone else's abuse.  The real crux of the matter is what will be our response to life's harshness.  Will our heart be broken down and hardened or broken open enabling us to live life with a greater capacity?  Our hearts can become hard, mean, closed, bitter, and resentful.  Or our hearts can be opened up, expanded, and softened; made a moist and verdant heart.

Often, it requires some work, practice, and intentionality to reopen a closed and hardened heart. One of the great gifts to us from the world's religious traditions is the gift of many different technologies or tactics that can help take us from despair to ecstasy.  For thousands of years holy men and women developed and passed down traditions and practices that could help lead us into the spiritual life.  Hinduism gave us yoga and the chanting of Sanskrit.  Buddhism gave us meditation. The Sufis gave us poetry and dance.  The Native Americans gave us the sweat lodge.  The historic Christian Church gave us beautiful cathedrals, organs, liturgy, and the sacraments.  The black gospel tradition gave us Hammond B3 organs, a walking bass line, and a strong back beat on the snare drum.  The list is endless.  While I think it is helpful to honor the wide variety of technologies provided to us by the religious containers, it is very important to understand that they are not "ends"; they are "means".  The tactics or practices are not the goal; they are paths to the goal. Unfortunately, some religious folk have gotten addicted to their technologies, turning their tactics into exclusive idols, even confusing their tactics with God.  To them, God can only be known or experienced in their setting, with their style, among their practices.  What a shame.

Anyone serious about living the spiritual life needs a good "tool box" filled with technologies that are effective to them.  Tools to help tend, open, soften, and prepare the heart.  However, remember please, your tool box of tactics are not the goal.  The goal is a heart opened to live in divine union with the natural ecstasies that are present in every moment.  A life raptured by the beauty of a sunrise.  A life overcome by the smile of a friend.  A life radically amazed by a simple touch.  Thank God for the gift of hundreds of "technologies of the soul" that can and do help us.  But let us go beyond, to a place where the whole universe is our Cathedral, where everyday is Sunday, where every creature is the Word of God, where every human being is the Beloved, where every sunrise is the Original Flaring Forth.  Let us go to the place where there can be no between.

What Would Be On Your Lists?

Things That Shrivel My Soul

- Fluorescent Lights
- People That Are Rude To Servers In A Restaurant
- Meetings
- Breakfast-In-A-Cup
- Walmart
- Praise And Worship Music That Goes On And On Forever
- People That Complain A Lot
- Conformists
- Golden Corral Buffet and Grill
- Violence
- Noise
- Clutter
- Fundamentalists
- Bigots & Homophobes
- Boring Sermons


Things That Expand My Soul

- Mountains
- Blue Jeans
- Candle Light
- Trees
- Gazing At The Stars
- Laughing People
- Music
- Oceans & Lakes & Rivers & Streams & Water Falls
- Slip-on Shoes
- Artists
- Hippies
- A Tender Touch
- Good Food & Drink
- A Hot Bath
- Silence
- Animals
- Poetry

Alchemy of the Soul

We are encouraged and given permission to take care of ourselves physically.  We are told to eat the right things, to stay away from certain foods, to exercise regularly, to not smoke, to not over drink, and we are encouraged to regularly see a doctor for a physical check-up.  Sad to say, we are not encouraged nor given permission to tend to our souls with the same priority.  I'm sure your boss would be quite understanding if you asked to take off from work to go see your doctor.  However, you might get a different response if you asked off from work to go visit with your spiritual director.  Most employers provide a certain number of "sick" days per year.  I imagine that about half of "sick" days are taken just because the person needs a break.  So they are forced to lie and say they are sick just to get the break.

Since the culture does not encourage us, nor is there any infrastructure in place to facilitate it, it's up to us as individuals to tend to our own souls.  The sadder commentary is that very little of what goes on in and with church has anything to do with taking care of our souls.  Heaven, Hell, doctrine, moral codes, budgets, programs, and the institution pretty much consume much of the focus.  As a matter of fact, church can actually be a place were one's soul might shrivel rather than soar.  To be perfectly honest and transparent, I've become quite allergic to a lot of things "church".

We have to become the alchemist of our own souls.  It is imperative that we give ourselves permission to arrange and structure our lives so that our soul will soar rather than shrivel.  Holy Wisdom is deep within you; a deep intuitive voice to guide you into what your soul needs and craves. Because we are all wired a little different, what the soul needs may differ.  It is up to you to discover the alchemy that works for you.  It is your work to uncover the things, places, settings, atmospheres, and people that expand your soul - and, give yourself permission to live primarily in that environment.  It is your work to be conscious and aware of the things, places, settings, atmospheres, and people that constrict your soul - and give yourself permission to stay away from that environment.  Sadly,  our lives are structured around almost everything else - work, money, taking care of our stuff, responsibilities, maybe even family or church - rather than caring for our souls.

One of the gifts of tragedy is that it shakes us free from all that that binds us.  It is unfortunate that it usually requires tragedy before we give ourselves permission to structure our lives in the way that we need to.  Jesus said, what good is it to gain the whole world and lose your soul in the process". What I'm about to say will sound very dangerous and may not even make good sense but I'm going to say it anyway.  Find the courage and will to structure your life so that your soul can soar.  If your job is killing you - find a new one.  If you are burdened by too much stuff - get rid if it.  If your in a relationship that is killing you - get out of it - life is too short.  If you're not getting anything from your church - go to another one.  If you hate where your live - move.  If you have a friend that drives you crazy - you don't have to be mean about it, but stop hanging out with them.  Find the power to just say "NO" to that that which constricts your soul.  Find the courage to say "YES" to that which brings you bliss.  Say "YES" to that which intoxicates you.  We only live once (that we know of) and life is short.  Today is all we've got so let's not waste it.

__________________________


TIRED OF SPEAKING SWEETLY

Love wants to reach out and manhandle us,
Break all our teacup talk of God.

If you had the courage and
Could give the Beloved His choice, some nights,
He would just drag you around the room
By your hair,
Ripping from your grip all those toys in the world
That bring you no joy.

Love sometimes gets tired of speaking sweetly
And wants to rip to shreds
All your erroneous notions of truth

That make you fight within yourself, dear one,
And with others,

Causing the world to weep
On too many fine days.

God wants to manhandle us,
Lock us inside of a tiny room with Himself
And practice His dropkick.

The Beloved sometimes wants
To do us a great favor:

Hold us upside down
And shake all the nonsense out.

But when we hear
He is in such a “playful drunken mood”
Most everyone I know
Quickly packs their bags and hightails it
Out of town.

~ Hafiz ~

Little Boxes: The Pseudo-Spirituality of Suburbia

"Little Boxes" a song written by Malvina Reynolds in 1962 (which is the year I was born) that lampoons the development of suburbia and its conformist values.  The song is used as the opening theme song for the hit Showtime television series Weeds.  In my opinion, the show is actually more of a commentary on the bankruptcy of soul in suburban culture than a show about weed.

If we look at the spirituality of Jesus, it is quite easy to see that Jesus lived with a rhythm of movement between an urban setting and a natural setting.  You might find him at the sea, or on a mountain, or in the wilderness.  The next day you might find Jesus back in a city or village to be among the people.  If we examine Jesus’ words and actions we can see that he is very comfortable in both settings and has the ability to see the sacred in both the natural and urban environment.  I can not help but project that the balance that Jesus held between the two environments was a way in which he kept his soul fresh and alive.

Historically, there were two kinds of people, city folk and country folk.  It is interesting to note that it was a regular phenomenon for the urbanites to take their vacation time and go to the country. And, the country dwellers would load up and take their vacations in the city.  It is quite possible that this is the human soul’s intuition working to maintain balance and to nourish itself from these two differing spiritualities: Urban and Natural.

Decades ago, after centuries of our species living primarily in urban or natural settings - we created a new habitat for ourselves - Suburbia.  Little boxes, privacy fences, closed garages, and uniformity which on the surface all looked convenient, safe, and wonderful.  This, new place for us to dwell, was no longer wild or natural.  And, it also did not have the energy, creative, diversity, and sense of community that urban settings have.  What we created was a kind of neutral zone that did not have the ingredients to nourish and keep our souls alive.  The result has been the rise of depression, addiction, and obesity.  Also, we have watched as authentic spiritualities were replaced with pseudo-spiritualities.  The rise of fundamentalism, the religious right movement, nationalism, and partisanism have all thrived in the suburbs.

Our soul’s intuition and wisdom tries to guide us if we would just listen.  Have you ever noticed that almost no one travels to the suburbs for their vacation (unless it is to visit friends or family).  All most exclusively we will use our leisure time to move back into a natural setting or we will visit an urban setting.  We will travel to the ocean, the mountains, to the wilderness - or to the city - our soul knows.

It is my opinion that much of the despair that exists today is directly connected to the lack of heart that exists in suburbia - this new habitat that we have created for ourselves.  What can we do about it?  For starters,  we can get out of our little boxes - we can get back outside and walk or ride our bikes - we can be intentional about placing ourselves in diverse settings - we can have the courage to move out of our comfort zones and away from the status quo - we can hang out with artist and creative folk - we can start to make and create things again - we can start to think and feel again - we can take holidays to natural settings - we can visit cities - we can become participators instead of spectators - we can get off the couch and put down the remote control.

Your soul and the soul of our culture might just depend on it.
_________________

Little boxes on the hillside,
Little boxes made of ticky tacky,
Little boxes on the hillside,
Little boxes all the same.
There's a green one and a pink one
And a blue one and a yellow one,
And they're all made out of ticky tacky
And they all look just the same.

And the people in the houses
All went to the university,
Where they were put in boxes
And they came out all the same,
And there's doctors and lawyers,
And business executives,
And they're all made out of ticky tacky
And they all look just the same.

And they all play on the golf course
And drink their martinis dry,
And they all have pretty children
And the children go to school,
And the children go to summer camp
And then to the university,
Where they are put in boxes
And they come out all the same.

And the boys go into business
And marry and raise a family
In boxes made of ticky tacky
And they all look just the same.
There's a green one and a pink one
And a blue one and a yellow one,
And they're all made out of ticky tacky
And they all look just the same.

Death Bed Conversion

A few weeks ago, I was contacted by a local physician, who informed me that an acquaintance of mine was in the hospital and that she was close to death and that she was asking for me.  Being with a person at the time of their death is a normal function of a priest.  However, what made this request unique is that I knew her to be a life long atheist.  When I entered the room it was dark, cold, and lonely.  I called her by name and slowly she rolled over to see who was speaking to her.  I could tell she was struggling to focus.   However, after a few squints she recognized me and said, "It's Fr. Stan White.  Please sit by me".  I scooted the chair right next to her bed and for the next few minutes we just sat there in silence.  The only thing to be heard was the sound of two human beings breathing. It was as if we were the only two people in an empty cathedral.  I did not want to embarrass her, but my friend was unaware that her blanket had fallen off of her and her hospital gown was not secure - she was lying there fully exposed.  I thought for a minute and decided to ask her if she would mind if I straightened her blanket and gown.  She replied and said that would be fine.  As I re-tied her gown and covered her up, she said with a tender voice, "that feels so nice".  I could tell, she had not been touched, except by clinical hands, for a very long time by the way she responded to my hands.

I sat back down next to her in the quiet.  The mind of this priest wondered what should I do now. After time went by just sitting with the silence, all of a sudden I heard myself say, "would you like for me to rub your back?"  She responded with a simple, "yes please".  I stood back up and, for the next ten minutes or so, lightly and tenderly rubbed her back as she moaned and uttered "thank you" and " that's so nice".

For a moment, my priest mind became a monkey mind; filled with questions about was I was being faithful, was I doing the right thing?  You see, there were no sounds of the sinner's prayer being repeated.  There were no preacher words dancing in the air.  There was no baptismal holy water to pour over her.  There were no elements of bread and wine to consume.  I'm not sure what or if anything happened to my friend that day; but, I know what happened to me.  I was born again.  I may not have been faithful to the church that day; but I have no doubt that I was faithful to God. See, what my friend needed was not a priest; what she needed was a human being.



Becoming Human
By Hafiz

Once a man came to me and spoke for hours about
"His great visions of God" he felt he was having.

He asked me for confirmation, saying,
"Are these wondrous dreams true?"

I replied, "How many goats do you have?"

He looked surprised and said,
"I am speaking of sublime visions
And you ask
About goats!"

And I spoke again saying,
"Yes, brother - how many do you have?"

"Well, Hafiz, I have sixty-two."

"And how many wives?"

Again he looked surprised, then said,
"Four."

"How many rose bushes in your garden,
How many children,
Are your parents still alive,
Do you feed the birds in winter?"

And to all he answered.

Then I said,
"You asked me if I thought your visions were true,
I would say that they were if they make you become
More human,
More kind to every creature and plant
That you know."

Dyslexia, Perception, and the Art of Happiness

One of the major factors in my life's narrative is that I'm dyslexic, and much more so than I ever let on.  I covered my dyslexia maybe because that I never wanted anyone to think I was less than.  As a child, I devised all kinds of techniques to avoid being called on to read out loud in class or to have to go up to write on the chalk board.  When it appeared that the teacher was about to call on someone to come up, I would immediately start to feel flush and faintly; like I could not breathe. Little beads of sweat would break out on my forehead, and basically I would feel like I was about to die (as an adult I've come to realize these episodes were panic attacks).  This scenario played out thousands of times throughout my childhood.  I was aware that my brain just could not perceive which order the letters of a word should go, even which way the letters in a word should face, and even the correct order of the words in a sentence.  The times I would be called on to go write on the chalk board felt like a living Hell.  I would get things so totally wrong, the other kids would laugh, the teacher would correct me, and here is the kicker - my brain could not even see or perceive what I had written incorrectly.  To me it looked just perfect.  Of course this affected me academically, effected my view of school, and still to this day I will feel the symptoms of a panic attack if I'm in a situation where I might be called on to read or write in front of a group. This is a major thread that runs through my entire life.  And, by the way, this is the most I've ever shared about this.

Just so you will not feel sorry for me, I have never doubted my intelligence.  I always felt, even as a child, that I had a high intelligence and that has been professionally verified since I've been an adult. I am very thankful for the gift of a computer.  Once I was able to use a computer my grades went from failing to winning academic awards.  Still to this day however, I struggle to hand write even a simple note.  I am thankful that I have had a job that primarily uses my voice and my ears.  My self image is that I am a good public speaker and I am a good listener.  I have not been all that effective when it comes to administration and facilitating departmental ministries (why I don't want a big church).  However, I can give a barn burner of a sermon and if one needs a priest to talk to, my ears are loving.

The biggest gift my dyslexia has given me however, is this fact that I do not see mistakes.  When I did have to go up and write on the chalk board it would always look perfect to me, even though it was a mess.  This trait has followed me through my entire life.  Even the times when things were hard, painful, ugly, dark; my brain would not allow me to see the mistakes or to view the situation as bad.  Things looked just perfect to me.  The result of this is that I've had the wonderful gift of being happy my entire life.  There is no doubt in my mind that happiness and perception are directly connected.  Jesus said, "If the eye of the body is healthy then what you perceive is light, but if the eye is not healthy what you perceive is darkness and it is gross darkness".  The art of living with happiness is directly connected to your ability to perceive all things as good, and perfect, and right, and light.  The spiritual practice of working with your perceptions is extremely important to those serious about their spiritual journey.  It may come a little easier for me because of my dyslexia, but the key to happiness for everyone is to develop the skill and ability to perceive all of life - the good and bad, the joys and the pain, the light and the darkness, the times you get it right and the times you get it wrong - as good, as gift, as blessing - even perfection.

My dyslexia has greatly affected my theology and Christian practice as well.  I really don't think about sin and judgement.  I don't really pester my mind with thoughts about the fall of humankind and the curse and the like.  And I'm way too busy living and loving to waste any precious time worrying or judging another person's morality.  The thought never even crosses my mind to try and figure out who's lost or not.

What you see on the chalk board may look like a mess.  If so, then that is your reality (and good luck with that).  But what I see looks perfect and I would appreciate it if you would not tell me otherwise.  Your perception is your reality and my perception is my reality and everything looks good from here; even if what you see is a mess.

Put Down the Binders and Spend Some Time with Seamus

We all live inside bubbles. Cultural constructs that we have created in which to exist. Each bubble has its own norms and its own vocabulary. Each bubble has a hierarchy of who and what's important. After a while, we become so used to our bubble that we start to believe that our bubble is all there is; our bubble is the entire universe. The sad commentary is that the bubble dweller no longer lives in direct contact with ultimate reality. We have constructed all kinds of bubbles to live in. Political bubbles, religious bubbles, racial bubbles, social bubbles, and cultural bubbles to name a few.

Meister Eckhart, the Dominican priest in the Middle Ages, was very concerned that the church was getting lost and locked inside its own construct. He preached trying his best to call the church out of its bubble. Of course, this rubbed the powers that be the wrong way. It's dangerous to mess around with the vested interest of a bubble; so Eckhart was condemned three times by the Pope. I love Eckhart's response to the church authorities. It's as if he felt sorry for them and felt that they were lost. He said, "It would do them good to spend sometime with a dog, for the life in the dog would bring them courage". I think what Eckhart was implying was that the church no longer lived connected to the real universe and that a dog might help them reconnect to the real.

Thomas Aquinas, another Dominican priest in the Middle Ages, spent his life writing to free the church from its Platonic, Augustinian, and fundamentalist bubble. He worked hard to expand the church's construct; trying to break it free from its Platonic philosophy by expanding to a Aristotelian philosophy. We should not be surprised that this got him in a lot of trouble only to be canonized later. His response to his critics was wonderful, Aquinas said, "It would serve you well to put down your big black books and perhaps spend sometime with a dog".

I was honored to spend some time with a Native American Shaman several years ago. He shared a story with me that I thought was fascinating. He said, "The four leggeds, the dogs, are worried about us two leggeds. Every time you see a group of dogs together they are having meetings to try and figure out how to help us. They think we have lost our way. That we are too busy, stressed, and out of touch with what is real. The dogs have come up with a plan to try to help us. First, they are going to connect with us at an even deeper level. And second, visit us more in our dreams". The Shaman ended his story by looking me in the eyes and saying, "we can have hope, the dogs are on our side".

The hope is that we can be free of the confinement of an artificial bubble and touch something utterly real instead. I leave you with a poem while I go spend a little time with my dog Bishop Judd before I have to go to work.

I think I could turn and live with animals, they are so placid and self contain’d,
I stand and look at them long and long.
They do not sweat and whine about their condition . . .
Not one is dissatisfied, not one is demented with the mania of owning things,
Not one kneels to another, nor to his kind that lived thousands of years ago,
Not one is respectable or unhappy over the whole earth.

- Walt Whitman, Leaves of Grass, Song of Myself

Art, Pornography, and the Soul

Otto Rank said (who was a part of Freud's inner circle during the formative days of modern psychology), "all neurosis is the result of the repressed artist". Rank believed that for a human being to be healthy and whole, they had to live a creative life; they had to live as an artist and keep the creative energy and spirit flowing though them. He viewed creativity as the life force that kept life in the body. Creativity and life were one and the same. To use theological language, the creative energy in a person is the same creative force that created everything; the creative energy in you is God. Rank was adamant that neurosis was the direct result of separating one's self from the creative flow.

Except for contemporary times, all human beings were artists. They had to be to survive. They made their tools, their clothes, their furniture, their homes, their toys, their cookware, canned their own vegetables, smoked their own meats, made their musical instruments - all of life was their art. Also, before the advent of radio/television/computers everyone was a performer. The front porch or the campfire was a stage and everyone was a singer, a musician, a dancer, a story teller. All God's children were artists and lived in and from the flow of creativity.

The development of modern commerce and trade started the process of pulling us away from creativity. We no longer had to create. We could just go and buy our tools, our clothes, and our furniture. So we stopped making things. The entertainment/sports industrial complex provided us with super stars so that we would no longer be entertainers and players. We would watch the professionals thus becoming a culture of spectators; forfeiting the creative energy of the universe, no longer living except vicariously through the pros. Now we watch someone play, we watch someone dance, we observe and usually it is not even in person or real life. We stare like pathetic, hypnotized subjects drooling over the gods of a two dimensional electronic projection.

If Otto Rank is correct, much of the despair and depression in our culture could be eradicated if we could figure out how to re-enter the creative energy of the universe; if we all lived in and claimed our identity as artist; if we could understand that God and creativity are one and the same; that art/creating is a spiritual practice; it is a way of praying or meditating.

Allow me to provide a few examples to illustrate just how removed we have become from the real thing.

- Rather than create, taste, smell and see real, wonderful food, we watch the Food Network.

- Rather than actually making things, we watch the DIY "Do It Yourself" Network (funny if you think about it).

- Rather than making love (see, if it's something you make or create - it's art) the culture spends billions of dollars a year and hours at the time watching a two dimensional projection of someone else making love. What makes this so pitiful is how often there is a very real human being probably in a another part of the same house. Silly humans.

We can turn this around. We can reclaim our identity as artist. Sing. Dance. Build. Play. Cook. Write. Paint. Make love. Create. And guess what, the important thing is not the result of the finished piece. The important thing is the doing of the piece. The act of placing yourself and your life in the divine flow of creative energy. Art is meditation. Art is medication.

Wild Geese and the Soul’s Journey

One of the best ways that I have found to care for the soul is with poetry. The poets speak to the heart and describe the journey we call life. They give language to things we feel yet often cannot find the words to describe. The poets stand in solidarity with us - their words remind us that we are not alone in the journey.

One of my favorite modern American poets is Mary Oliver. Her poem “Wild Geese” has resonated with thousands who have been touched by her words. I share this poem with you and I hope its words resonate with you and that the words take you to a deep soulful space.

I offer the following reflection points to help in pondering the poem and to think about what the poem might be being saying to us about the soul’s journey.

1. - The Soul’s journey is not about moral codes or esoteric spiritual practice.

2. - The Soul’s journey must be grounded in loving the organic and the ordinary.

3. - The Soul’s Journey includes pain and despair.

4. - The Soul’s journey requires us to keep perspective.

5. - The Soul’s journey takes us to the place where we realize everything is connected.

A helpful exercise is to make personal connections with the poem. As you reflect on the poem what thoughts and feelings come to mind from your own journey and your own experiences? Self reflection is essential if your going to be serious about your psychological and spiritual growth. I find that poetry is a wonderful tool to help one increase self awareness and therefore to be more conscious and awake.

Peace to you from a fellow traveler on the path.


Wild Geese
by Mary Oliver

You do not have to be good.
You do not have to walk on your knees
for a hundred miles through the desert, repenting.
You only have to let the soft animal of your body
love what it loves.
Tell me about despair, yours, and I will tell you mine.
Meanwhile the world goes on.
Meanwhile the sun and the clear pebbles of the rain
are moving across the landscapes,
over the prairies and the deep trees,
the mountains and the rivers.
Meanwhile the wild geese, high in the clean blue air,
are heading home again.
Whoever you are, no matter how lonely,
the world offers itself to your imagination,
calls to you like the wild geese, harsh and exciting--
over and over announcing your place
in the family of things.

The Sacred Breath

"And she formed human kind from the dust of the ground and breathed the nashama into her and she became a living soul".

In all wisdom traditions, it is understood that there is a direct connection between the breath and the spiritual life. Two Hebrew words describe this: "nashama", meaning both breath and soul, and "ruach", meaning both breath and spirit. The ancient understanding was that the breath and the soul/spirit were one and the same. The breath was indivisible from God and indivisible from the very cosmos itself. The breath is one with "dabhar", the creative energy of the universe. In others words, when you breathe in, you are breathing in and are one with soul, spirit, the creative energy of the universe, with God.

In Greek, the word "pneuma" meaning breath, soul, spirit, and wind. This is the "rushing mighty wind" that blew on the Day of Pentecost when the 120 were filled with the Spirit. This is the wind that blew across Ezekiel's valley of dry bones and brought them back to life. This is the wind/spirit that moved across the deep/darkness to give birth to the cosmos. The same breath that Jesus breathes on the disciples as he says, "receive the Holy Spirit".

In Sanskrit, the word "Prana" is the word for "life". In Yoga, Prana enters the body through the breath and is sent to every cell of the body. Working with the breath is a major component of all Yoga practice. In Buddhist meditation, one begins by simply placing one's attention on the breath; being present with and aware of the breath. The transformative power of this simple practice is astonishing. If you take just a few minutes a day to focus on your breath you will be amazed by its effect.

Try it today. Find a comfortable and quiet place, calm and relax your body, now place your attention on your breath. Breathe in, breathe out. Notice the sound. Feel the breath traveling through you. Notice the rise of your rib cage as you fill the bottom of your lungs. If your mind wanders away from your breath, gently return your attention back to your breathing. Be present in the moment. Acknowledge that the present moment is a perfect and wonderful moment. Remember to smile. Love and cherish your breath; it's free. It did not cost you a thing. It is a gift. Your breath is life, soul, and spirit; the creative energy of the cosmos. In this moment you are one with God and the universe.

The New Normal: A Culture Of Half-Asses

We are over committed. The expectations are at times overwhelming; work, chores, bills, taxes, house work, yard work, church responsibilities, club and organization meetings, kid activities, school activities, spouse/partner support, car maintenance, exercise routines, cooking, shopping - the list seems endless. The new normal expects us to succeed at everything. The new normal requires us to multi-task and forces us to burn the candle at both ends.

It may appear that we are holding things together; smart phone in one hand, the phone is ringing, text coming in, email coming in - tablet in the other, trying to add an item to the task list all while rushing to an appointment. Recent studies in neuroscience reveal that we are not holding it together at all. In fact, the new normal is wearing us down emotionally and even intellectually. We are actually starting to dumb down as a species. Multi-tasking is making us stupid. Because we have so much on our plate, none of it is done well. There's nothing we do with all our heart, mind, and strength. We're not invested. We've become a culture of half-asses. Thomas Aquinas, in the Middle Ages, called this the sin of Acedia. He defines Acedia as "sloth" or "slow love". He described Acedia as, "not having the desire to try new things". He goes on to say that the result of Acedia is boredom, loneliness, restlessness, a lack of curiosity, ingratitude, and sadness.

It seems to me, that we need to somehow break free of the cultural expectations of the new normal. We need to free ourselves from some of our obligations. We need to learn to say no. We need to stop the multi-tasking. We need to strive for quality not quantity. The spirituality of Jesus is about loving with ALL your heart and soul, with ALL your mind, and with ALL your strength and might - not Acedia or "slow love".

I encourage you to break free today! Clean some things off your task list and make some space for a new paradigm. Today, climb out of Acedia and fully invest in something with all you've got. Today, give something your all. If you're gonna laugh - laugh with all you've got. If you're gonna make love - put the remote down, turn the TV off, and rock your partner's world. If you're gonna cook - make it a feast. If you're gonna play - play hard. If you're gonna love - love with all your heart. It's time for us to get the other half of our ass back.

Humility - Humus - Human - Humor

The whirlwind, that circles around our heads, so often sounds like this:


“I am right - you are wrong, she is in - he is out, they are to blame - we are getting it right, we are enlightened - they are ignorant."

"Who is eating of the tree of life - who is eating of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil?”

So often, authentic spirituality is confused with a psychological boost that comes from the feeling that one is correct.

On the other hand, authentic spirituality is the humble acknowledgment that we are all bothers and sisters. We are all members one of another. We are all made of the same stuff. We all share this same journey that we call life.

Humility - Humus - Human - Humor

As part of your spiritual practice today, try to go through the day feeling as though you are an advocate standing in solidarity with every person that you come in contact with.

Peace to you all and may we all live into this reality -
“every person has the right to eat from the tree of life.”

The Simple, The Complex, The Enlightened

One of my most transformative experiences was the opportunity I had to spend a little time with the world renowned author and teacher Robert Johnson. Robert explained to me one day that there are three different kinds of people. He explained it to me this way:

-The simple person walks outside, looks up at the stars, takes a few deep breaths, then wonders, “What's for dinner?”

- The complex person wonders about the task to be done and especially the ones that have not been. The complex person’s attention may be focused on the stock market going up and down and their mind will be moving very rapidly from one thing to another. Their breathing will be rapid and shallow. The complex person’s mind will be filled with lots of knowledge and data and will most likely be multitasking.

- The enlightened person walks outside, looks up at the stars, takes a few deep breaths, then wonders, “What's for dinner?”

I have pondered this many times. How the early stages and the later stages in the development of human consciousness look and feel very similar. Biologically speaking, the same is also true - a new born and the person close to death have many of the same needs and are usually cared for in like ways.

Robert Johnson, whom I consider to be one of the most enlightened human beings that I have had the honor to spend time with, lived most of his last years among simple, uneducated, poor peasants in India. I asked him why he chose to live there and he simply replied, “Because my soul is alive there among my friends.”

My maternal grandfather was a very attractive, charismatic, successful businessman and farmer. As I child I loved to spend time with him. When he would get off work he would say to me, “Doodle (he called me Doodle) let's hop in the truck and go take a ride to the Back Woods.” We would hop in. All the windows had to be rolled down for lots of fresh air. Out into the woods we would ride. I would watch him as he gazed at the land, at the trees, and the sky - almost like he was connected to, and one with the land, the trees and the sky. Eventually we would arrive at what he called the “Back Woods.” A little farm community of simple, small, unpainted wood houses which all had front porches. The residents, all African American - the men dressed in denim overalls and work boots - the women dressed in homemade simple dresses. As we got out of the truck, I could see the smile on my grandfather’s face. It was as if he had arrived home. He would be greeted with smiles and hugs. They were all friends. He asked them if they remembered Doodle (that’s me). They would hug me, and pat me on the head. We would go from house to house - porch to porch - sharing food, sharing stories, feeling the breeze, looking out over the land, breathing slowly. Eventually, the sun would set and we would have to get back in the truck and ride back to our complex world.

At a family wedding in Alabama, my brother (who is also an Episcopal Priest) was assigned the task of hosting a dignitary that would be attending the wedding. The dignitary was Bishop Barbara Harris, the first women to be ordained a Bishop in the worldwide Anglican Communion. Bishop Harris is a short little African American lady. After the wedding ceremony, all of the guests made their way to the Dothan Country Club for the reception. During the reception, my brother looked around the hall and could not find Bishop Harris. He looked and looked and could not find her anywhere. He thought to himself, “Good Lord I have lost the very first woman Bishop in the whole world.” He continued his search and finally asked some of the kitchen staff members had they seen the little lady that is wearing a clerical collar? The staff reported that they did in fact know where she was. They reported to him that she was out behind the kitchen. My brother walked through the kitchen. He passed the dish pit and walked out the back door. There she was, Bishop Harris, an equal in a circle of dish washers. She had a beer in one hand and a cigarette in the other. He listened as they shared stories and told jokes. He watched them breathe slowly. He finally interrupted and said, “Bishop Harris I will be inside if you need anything.” He left the Bishop and the dish washers and he returned back to the complex world.

Henry David Thoreau left his complex life and attempted to reenter what he called the essential life by living in a small cabin beside Walden Pond. He stayed there for two years. I am conscious of the fact that three years ago my life was way too complex. I was too busy. The structure of my life was so overwhelming that I had no clue how to step down from the complex life. In my my case, life circumstance carried me to Walden Pond; which probably saved my life. Three years later I'm starting to emerge from the Back Woods. However, my hope is that never again will I get lost in a complex life. For now I know, I can always sit outside and gaze up at the stars. I can slow my breathing down. I can share stories and tell jokes with friends, family, and people I love. I can just sit for a moment in the peace and stillness. I feel a smile coming on because that seems like home. I wonder, “What’s for dinner?”

Crawling Out Of The Shell

For the past three years, for personal reasons, I have lived an extremely introverted and almost hermit-like existence.  I've had lots of alone time.  I've been outside for hours at the time.  I've sat in and with silence sometimes for days.  This is quite a contrast from the urban and extroverted life I lived before.  For the last three years I did my job as rector of the parish and as a father to my kids, but other than that I have not done much of anything.  I've hardly read, which is unusual for me.  I've not written (words or music), which is unusual for me.  I've not been creative.  My brain at times just felt too tired to even think.  For the last three years, my life has very much been about being rather that doing; silence rather than words (voice); empty spaces rather than spaces filled with objects.  At times I would wonder if I would ever speak again (beyond my parish), write again, or create again.  I really did not know.  I am very thankful for the people who love me and that have told me regularly that I was not finished.  I wanted to believe them, but at times I did not.  And, I became ok with the fact that I may not. I guess that is a kind of "letting go".

On October 24, out of the blue, I created the "confessions" page and wrote the first post.  Almost immediately, I felt my mind coming to life.  I felt my creative juices starting to flow again.  It may appear a small step to you, but it was a big step for this hermit to crawl out of its shell.  Last week according to the Facebook report, we had an actual reach of 1,645 people with the potential reach of 19,676 (friends of friends).  Folk may tire of my ramblings and this growth my not be sustainable, however I'm writing for my own therapy and my own re-awaking.  If anyone else resonates with it that's just a bonus.  I realize that to some "confessions" may be a little edgy.  If you feel that way, I apologize if I've been offensive to you in anyway.  However at this point in my life, I am too tired and have been through too much not to speak my truth if I'm going to speak at all.

I am very thankful for all of you that liked, commented, and shared however some people are not Facebook users.  So, starting today, "confessions" will be available in several different formats.  You can go to, or refer someone to, my personal website, www.stanleyjwhite.com and click the links to follow on twitter, see a blog archive of my posts, or sign up to receive an email version.

There's a time to be still; there's a time to dance.  There's a time to just be; there's a time to create. There's a time to be quiet; there's a time to speak.  It's always time to love.

Get Outside And Dance

It can be quite uncomfortable to live in two worlds at the same time.

The culture tends to pull everything a part and divide things into different compartments:

Sacred - Secular
Light - Shadow
Good - Evil
Acceptable - Unacceptable
Holy - Profane
Adult - Child
Head - Heart
Work - Play
Spirit - Body

In contrast, the spiritual path is about putting everything back together. Rumi said, “somewhere beyond good and evil there is a field ... I will meet you there.” The Psalmist said, “to God, night and day are both alike.” Jesus prayed, “ may my disciples learn to live into the one.” The mystics call this the undivided life.

I some times tire of of trying to live the undivided life in the midst of all the division. Then I hear Hafiz remind me to just, “get outside and dance!”

How the Pentecostal/Charismatic Movement Failed Protestant Christianity and the World - How John Paul II and Benedict XVI Failed Roman Catholicism and the World

Islam had the Sufis, Judaism had Jesus and the Kabbalist, Hinduism had the Buddha; all of these were renewal movements that the spirit used to breathe new life into old, dead religious structures. These renewal movements were about creating openness. They were about the expansion of ideas, thought, perception, and experience. They were about a new construct and world view; a new paradigm - "new wine in new wine skins". These renewal movements broke free from the confinements of the legalistic and fundamentalism of their day and gave spiritual liberty to those in spiritual bondage. The 20th century was the recipient of two major renewal movements: the Pentecostal/Charismatic Movement and the Second Vatican Council. In my opinion, both were God breathed movements designed by the spirit to bring new life into structures and a culture that was spiritually dying.

The Pentecostal Movement, at the beginning of the 20th century, was mystical, prophetic, inclusive, progressive, and fully integrated as far as race and gender. The movement was about direct experience of the holy; not doctrine or narrow theology. My family's roots go back to the early days of this movement. We are quite comfortable with, and we are very honoring of, the origins of this movement. However, we are not at all comfortable with where it wound up and have not been associated with it since the eighties. Here's what happened:

- By 1910 the movement had started to segregate racially.

- By 1915 the movement was starting to institutionalize.

- By 1920 women, who had been a major part of the movement's leadership, were now being held at a lower level.

- By 1925 they were dropping their more mystical and open theology and now replacing it with a very narrow, dispensational, and fundamentalist doctrine.

- In the 1980's the movement totally co-opted itself and forfeited what it was meant to be by getting in bed with the extreme political right and the Roman Catholic right.

What was designed by the spirit to bring freshness, newness, and liberty was now oppressing, limiting, binding minorities, women, divorced people, gays and lesbians. This movement may now dress in blue jeans on Sundays, play rock and roll music to Jesus lyrics at church, have contemporary stages, lights, and video screens - but beware, underneath that modern facade is a Christianity that is not refreshed and expanded, but one that is even more narrow, judgmental, and controlling. It's a movement ready to damn you to Hell if you don't meet the standard of their doctrine and moral codes. A movement that is driven to control women's bodies and determined to police your bedroom. Forgive me for being so blunt but, to me, it is down right blasphemous what the leaders of this movement have done to this authentic renewal movement. The have failed Protestant Christianity and the world.

In the early 1960's, the Second Vatican Council was a spirit-breathed movement to bring new life into the Roman Catholic Church. Pope John XXIII initiated this movement by saying it was time to, "throw open the windows of the church and let fresh air of the spirit to blow through". There were many positive reforms as a result of Vatican II. However, by the time of Pope John Paul II, the freshness and freedom started to decay into bondage and here's what happened:

- John Paul II along with Cardinal Ratzinger (now Pope Benedict XVI) using the office of Inquisition, now called the Congregation for the Doctrine for the Faith, moved away from theology and replaced it with ideology by spreading fear among theologians. The expulsion from the priesthood of three prominent theologians on three continents in the 1990's sent fear into the ranks of theological thinkers. Those three theologians are Leonardo Boff from Latin America; Eugene Dreuermann from Germany; and Matthew Fox in North America.

- The canonization of the card-carrying fascist priest who founded the Opus Dei movement, even though this man actually praised Adolf Hitler, and also denounced women.

- The taking of Opus Dei under the hand of the papacy granting it legitimacy and power within and without the Catholic structure.

- The conscious destruction and systemic dismantling of the Liberation Theology movement and the very vital base communities it spawned in Latin America in particular. John Paul II (with the encouragement and support of the CIA) destroyed liberation theology and replaced it with opus dei bishops and cardinals.

- A preoccupation with morality as sexual issues even when this morality is deeply flawed.

- The forbidding of one billion Catholics world-wide to practice birth control even while the human population explodes at the seams.

- The forbidding of the use of condoms even in a time when AIDS is killing individuals and whole populations the world over.

- The headlong pursuit of Augustine's theology of sexuality (all sex must be legitimized by having children).

- Ugly attacks in the pope's name against homosexuals and the complete ignoring of what science and professional psychological associations have learned about homosexuality.

- The rigid sticking to celibacy as a requisite for being a priest (as well as the requisite of having exclusively male genitals) means fewer and fewer Catholics have access to the sacraments and fewer and fewer persons are drawn to study for the priesthood. The average priest world wide is over 60 years of age.

- John Paul II granted a "man of conscience" award to Rupert Murdoch.

- Other attacks include documents against yoga, against Buddhism (calling it "atheism"), against Thich Naht Hahn (calling him the "Antichrist"); against feminist philosophers, and against women (women can't be priests).

Let us not forget the history, size, influence,and the universality of the entire human family which includes every man, woman, girl, and boy regardless of race, nationality, gender, age, religion, or sexual orientation - we are family. Unfortunately, the leaders that inherited the two major renewal movement of the 20th century squandered the opportunity for new life and healing to come to our planet. They shut the window tight, they have have failed the church and the world.

Oh God make speed to save us. Oh Lord make haste to help. Please open the window again and allow your fresh spirit to free us from our oppressors.

The Buddha and The Cross

I find it very interesting that the Buddha found enlightenment as he let go of everything under the bodhi tree and that Jesus was fully glorified as he let go of everything nailed to a tree.

Miester Eckhart, the Dominican Priest in the Middle Ages said, "nothing is gained in the soul by adding anything, but rather by the process of subtraction". To Eckhart, the real spiritual work that needs to be done is the work of letting go and peeling away all the attachments and addictions that we've added on top of the authentic self. We are such an addictive culture (addiction - to add on top of). We look high and wide to all sorts of things to find fulfillment and satisfaction - possessions, personas, professions, even people (co-dependence). We get addicted to these attachments. We cling to them. We hold on tight as if our lives depend on them. But in reality, it is our attachments that choke out real life. When Eckhart speaks about the process of subtraction, he is speaking about this spiritual work of letting go; of sifting through all the things we have piled on top of the self.

It is interesting and unfortunate that Eckhart is rarely quoted in traditional Christianity. In fact, Eckhart who was a Christian, is most often quoted by Sufis and Buddhists. A major emphasis of Buddhism is that true happiness and enlightenment only comes by letting go of all attachments. The highest form of the self is only known by detachment. All through the teachings of the historical Jesus is the same philosophy. "In order to find your life you must lose it; leave your boat, leave your nets, leave your father, leave your mother and follow me".

In total honesty with you, the heavy emphasis in traditional Christianity on Jesus' death on the cross as some blood sacrifice that is payment for my penalty seems quite primitive and not palatable to my twenty-first century thought about a God that we define as love. I do however, think that the archetype of the cross is an extremely powerful and important symbol of the ultimate letting go - it is the ultimate symbol of subtraction. Eckhart goes as far as to say, "I pray to God every day - to rid me of God". To him, that was the pinnacle of letting go - letting go of all idols, attachments, constructs, and addictions. I'm pretty sure that one can not get any more Zen than that. Buddhism, Jesus, Eckhart, and the beautiful sign of the cross - they all call us to "let go" that we might "live". Jesus says to Peter, "you can walk on the water". In other words, you can live a different kind of life and existence - but to find it, "you've got to leave the boat behind".

At some point in life, we will all find our cross - we will all sit under the bodhi tree.

Jesus and The Chakras

The Eastern Wisdom traditions created a vocabulary that provided a way for the practitioner to name and also increase awareness to the different aspects of the human matrix. These different aspects of human existence interface with the human body at different physical centers or locations in the human body. They call these centers chakras. Most of the teachers in the East taught that there were seven chakras running from the base of the spine to the crown of the head. The center chakra is the heart chakra which is about love and compassion. The three lower chakras are slower in vibration. These have more to do with raw energy, power, and strength and are more primitive in nature. The three chakras above the heart are more refined and are faster in vibration. They have more to do with voice, understanding and intellect. Eastern practice encouraged the practitioner to increase the capacity of the heart chakra so that it would overflow all the others thus taming the lower energies and enlightening the higher energies. The goal is that one would, from all levels of one's existence, express their life through and from the energy of the heart - love and compassion.

Connect this spiritual work with how Jesus summarizes his spiritual path. "Love God with all your heart and soul (heart chakra), and with your strength and might (lower chakras), and with all your mind and understanding (upper chakras). The result is one that lives life, at all levels, from the heart and from love. This work prepares us for the second part of Jesus' summation, "love your neighbor as yourself". Just as the teachers in the East, Jesus calls us to this work; the work of allowing our heart to tame our more primitive parts and to enlighten our more refined parts so that the whole self can live in and with divine love and express holy compassion.

Great People Drop Keys

When I was a kid, there were two things my mother would not tolerate. First, I was not allowed to say, "I can't ...". Her response would be, "can't never could". The second, she would not allow me to talk bad about other people - even when the person deserved it. She would stop me in mid sentence and say, "small people talk about other people, great people talk about concepts".

It concerns me how addicted the culture is to exposing the mistakes, pains, scars, and secrets of one another. The result is a continuing cycle of all of us being even more deeply wounded. I have known great people that, rather than expose would cover; freeing the people around them and restoring their dignity. I love, in the story of the prodigal son, how the father rushes out with a robe to cover (not expose) the sins of the prodigal son. The son walked back to the house with his dignity in tact. Jesus said, "I was naked, and you covered me, ... and as you do even to the least, you do to me".

One of my favorite Sufi poets is Hafiz, and he says it this way.

The small man 

Builds cages for everyone 

He

Knows.

While the sage,

Who has to duck his head

When the moon is low,

Keeps dropping keys all night long

For the

Beautiful

Rowdy

Prisoners.

One way that healing can come to our planet is for us to stop all the exposing and start covering one another instead. This is what great people do! Great people drop keys, freeing the people around them. The dignity that is preserved just might be our own.

A Patron Saint for Agnostics

The church usually frowns on people that have doubts and questions. Ever since St. John's gospel found its way into the New Testament cannon rather than St. Thomas' - orthodoxy has trumped mysticism. Orthodoxy demands "belief in" and "metal assent to" perceived absolutes. Mysticism embraces mystery - thus allowing for and even honoring doubts and questions. St. John's gospel is the one that gives us the story of Thomas being the Doubter; maybe trying to discourage folk from following the more mystical ways of Thomas. Other gospel traditions however, refer to Thomas as the Twin - the one most like Jesus.

Maybe we could make Thomas the patron saint for agnostics (a- "without", gnosis- "knowledge"). What a beautiful, honest, authentic, and humble thing to admit, "I don't know". The spiritual path of "Thomas the Twin" (mysticism) is a beautiful path that leads to something beyond knowledge - it leads to wisdom. Agnosis moves one to diagnosis (dia- "to evaluate or struggle with", gnosis- "knowledge"). Diagnosis leads one to prognosis (pro- "before, to precede, beyond", gnosis- "knowledge"). The questions and doubts of the agnostic is a valid spiritual path that can lead one to that place of awe and wonder beyond knowledge; to wisdom and into the limitless mystery. What a beautiful journey to pursue - a beautiful quest to be engaged with and you can't quest without questions.

To be honest, I am over debating scripture and I have no interest in having a theological wrestling match with anyone. I do desire however, a living and direct experience with ultimate wisdom. To authentically embrace our doubts, struggles, and questions is the path of Thomas - the path of the Twin. A path that carries us into the great mystery and leads to direct experience with holy wisdom. I will meet you there!